I’ve Seen The Other Side: My Holley Days.

And, I can’t say I like it all that much.  I’m talking about being a working mom.  I have been working at my second (to being a wife and mother) job way too much lately.  To get ahead, to save for SC’s looming school, to live our lavish-less lifestyle on St. Croix of food & water.

Thankfully, I like my job, what I do and the peeps I work with, well, most of the time.  But I miss my kids, my husband, my friends, my gym, my crafting, sewing, baking, cooking, organizing, wifing & mothering.

I come home exhausted and frustrated that  I have no energy for my family or myself.  Frustrated that I just spent the better part of the day giving my best to an employer when I should be giving my best to my family.  Waking at 3am to get “house keeping” done is no fun.

I live in Paradise, dammit.  Where is the beach?  Where is the sun and my year-long healthy tan?  Where is my pina-colada and moo-moo?

 

 Where are the annoying endless pay-date invitations?  Loud mornings at the library?  Rolling down the hills at the Fort?  Taking the Fisherman lunch?  Nap time happy hour is a thing of this mommy’s past.

Is this what it is like in America of an endless cycle of you work to put your kids in school, your kids are in school so you work? When do you enjoy them?  This is all so new to me; I am having to adjust routines, schedules and the like.   Thankfully there is as end in sight with the holidays when the kids are out of school. For over two weeks.   That means I get to stay home…which means gym, baking, cooking, sewing, crafting, play dates! hiking, beaching, parking, picnicking, wifing and mothering. 

Watch out St. Croix.  I will be the SAHM From Hell.  I’ll enjoy this time off to the fullest, because it won’t last for ever.  In paradise, we have a higher cost of living with a lower level of expectation.  These are truly my Holley Days.  But actually, in my world with my family, with my friends, in my paradise, every day is a Holley Day.  Even if I have to work.

xo
bfm

WE LIVE ON AN ISLAND FOR F-SAKE!

And guess what?  It is hot.  And guess what else?  My kids ARE naked all the time.  And guess what?  Your’s would be too if YOU lived here, but you don’t.  And guess what else?  It really helps keep laundry at bay.

AND it’s not like I send them to school naked (just with out shoes).  They have a butt load of clothes (I come from a family of professional shoppers).  More clothes than I know what to do with.  But when I see my little girls face bright red and a bead of sweat dripping down her cheek, the first thing I want to do is rip her clothes off to cool her down. Its NOT like I can just stick her in the house with the AC on.

Have YOU ever tried telling a terrorizing 2 year old to “Just sit and chillax” for a while to cool down?  Ya, ain’t gonna happen in my house.  He goes 90 miles an hour full steam.  And the more comfortable I can keep him, the happier we all will be. And the less clothes he has on, the cooler he’ll be, the less chance for that pesky prickly heat.

It not like….never mind.  I don’t have to justify myself.  My kids are my kids.  Go do your own damn thing.

Get On With It.

We all struggle with life decisions. Most likely, you are not the first person to struggle with what ever it is that is on your mind. That is bugging you. That you are having a hard time making a decision for this or that reason. To better yourself, your family, your marriage.

But make a decision. Shit or get off the pot. Make a decision, be confident in it and move on.

Who am I to say that? Those who were close to me while I was trying to make the decision to go back to work knew that I kept flip flopping. But here’s the thing. I wouldn’t know how it was going to turn out unless I tried. I was confident enough in myself to give it a whirl. AND if it didn’t work out, then big (f-in) deal. I’m home with my kids and maybe that was what it was supposed to be.

But it did work out. And I am glad. I am at peace with my decision. I work part-time. And I just LOVE it when people say “It gives you a break….out of the house….around adults.” That is the stupidest response, and I know I am being harsh, but it is, it’s a break. That’s obvious. But I seriously doubt you understand how freakin’ hot it is here at my house with no AC. THAT is why I wanted to go back to work. To cool off during the day.

Ok, all kidding aside. You WON’T know unless you try. Whatever it is you are deciding. Make a decision and move on. Quit talking about it. Quit hee-hawing. Just decide already. SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT.

Too funny not to share…